Strength in weakness!

Reflecting on Mark 9:14-29

"I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24)

There are two lines in this passage that stand out to me.
The one above speaks to my own experience of faith and belief.
I believe, and yet I still do not fully believe.
I admit it, I belong to the unbelieving generation (Mark 9:19).

Jesus is not angry with people who have weak faith.
The translation of Jesus’s words makes it sound like he is frustrated.
“How long shall I stay with you? How long shall I (bear) with you?” (Mark 9:19)
What I hear is the recognition that He will stay for a long time.
He knows we struggle to believe, yet He still bears with us, no matter how long.
The questions only indicate His human feelings with wait.
Like a parent wondering how long they must wake in the night with their baby.
Or a teacher wondering how long they must reexplain the basics of grammar.
You look forward to when they get it, but you know it takes time.

It is not our struggle to believe that is frustrating.
It is when we refuse to admit our weakness, and need for help.
When we make no effort to learn and grow in our faith.
The disciples, and this man, are struggling, but they are trying.
The disciples tried to heal the boy and failed.
This man was hopeful Jesus could help, but he wasn’t fully sure.
Can we relate to trying and failing?
Can we relate to wanting to believe, yet not being sure?

All that Jesus asks of us is that we admit it.
In my experience, people are ashamed to admit their doubts.
Publicly they talk about believing, but privately they still doubt.
Are we afraid of admitting our weakness to God and others.
Are we worried our doubts will make us look bad, or make us lesser?
Admitting our doubts does not weaken us, it can actually make us stronger.

“Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:8-10)

Those who trust Jesus are not the ones who’ve figured it all out.
Their confidence is in Jesus, not in their own strength of faith.
We sense something more, something better in Jesus, and we hope.
Most Jesus followers I know believe, yet still experience unbelief.
For me, I have both faith and doubt, but my faith is stronger than my doubt.

Too often our church experience discourages those who doubt.
The words of the songs, prayers and sermons sound so confident, so sure.
We sing “I Surrender All”, but secretly we still hold back.
We declare “I believe in…”, but privately we’re questioning.
Sermons urge us to believe, and celebrate those who do.
Testimonies are victory stories, shaming us for not having our own.
If someone admits doubts or weakness, others correct them.
Full agreement is insisted upon, no room for doubts or questions.

The family of Jesus is not made up of ideal believers.
The actual ‘church’ is made up of people who believe and don’t.
People who struggle to try, and those who struggle as they try.
We need to give struggling believers the opportunity to be heard.
To come to Jesus and others and honestly admit…
“I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24)
There is strength in weakness, their is hope in doubt.
Because when we are weak, the strong One bears with us.
Because when our faith is insufficient, His grace is sufficient.

Personally I am OK with my faith and doubt.
Not satisfied to keep it that way, but OK with Jesus.
I am OK with the fact that I am not certain.
My previous denomination insisted on full agreement and belief.
I could not give them that, nor would I.
For I know my faith, my doubts, my questions, my weakness.
I am not able to be confident in my faith.
But that does not make me lose confidence in God’s grace.
It is not my faith that saves me, it is God’s grace that saves me.
My mustard seed faith, weak as it is, is how I receive that grace.

Admitting weakness and doubt is also good for others too.
For the many who secretly question and doubt.
It assures them that they are not alone.
And it reminds them that struggling faith is OK for Jesus.
Don’t let people shame you for your struggling faith.
Join me in my struggling faith, bringing my unbelief to Jesus.
Eager to learn and grow, and be stronger in my faith.
Confident enough to come to Jesus as I am and say…
“I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” (Mark 9:24)

PRAYER
Lord Jesus, You know my weakness and doubt better than I do myself. No doubt You are wondering how long it will take, how long You must bear with me. But You have promised to be with me to the very end, despite my weakness. I hang on to Your grace, and not my faith. For in my weak faith, Your power is strong!