Struggling, yet wanting to believe!

Reflecting on Luke 9:37-43

"You unbelieving and perverse generation, how long shall I stay with you and put up with you?" (Luke 9:41)

These words of Jesus do not sound loving, patient, kind or gentle?
Who is Jesus speaking about, the man or his son, or the disciples?
In other versions of this story, Jesus explains why the disciples struggled.

“His disciples asked him privately, ‘Why couldn’t we drive it out?’ He replied, ‘This kind can come out only by prayer.'” (Mark 9:28-29)

This suggests that the disciples were not the problem.
Jesus speaks about that specific generation, the people of that time.
The father seems sincere enough; was it the crowd surrounding them?
It is hard to be certain, but either way the words seem harsh.
Were they really perverse, as we understand that word?
Was Jesus really “putting up with” people, as we use that phrase?
The word translated ‘perverse’ literally means ‘turned away’.
The word translated ‘put up with’ literally means ‘to bear with’.

My suspicion is that this translation is not helping us.
My assumption is always that Jesus is gracious and gentle when He speaks.

To call a generation unbelieving or turned away does not need to be an insult.
There are generations that struggle to believe.
There are generations that have turned away from God.
The church loves to accuse them of being antifaith and immoral.
But many struggle to believe, and turn away, from a twisted religion.
Think about how hard Jesus was on the religious establishment.
Today many are resistant to faith BECAUSE of the religious establishment.
They don’t trust religious leaders, even the good ones.
It takes great patience (endurance, bearing with) to work with such people.
They may be sincerely seeking hope and help, but they don’t trust christians.

Jesus is not “putting up with” us, in the negative way this sounds.
Jesus does bear with us, is patient with us.
Jesus does struggle with how slow we are to believe, but doesn’t give up.
Behind the question is this certainty: He will be patient with us!
He knows our struggles, and the demons that deceive and defeat us.
How long has God put up with sinful, straying, disbelieving humans?
From the very beginning, to the very end!

Whenever I encounter difficult words, I read them through the lens of love.
If something sounds cruel or harsh, I assume gentleness and grace.
Yes, the people of that time were misguided and skeptical.
Yet Jesus knew that they did not know what they were doing.
He even recognizes that the religious establishment was misguided.

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34)

This shows the answer to His own question, how long He will bear with them.
Jesus endures us, suffers with us, is patient with us, even to the point of death.
I hear these words of Jesus as words of comfort, an assurance of His patient love.
Yes we do not believe as we should, nor do we live as we should.
Yes we are slow to understand, and we are misguided in our devotion.
Yet He is still with us – with me – and bears with my struggle to believe.

I am also convicted for my slowness to believe, but this does not shame me.
It only assures me of His enduring patience and love.
And this love compels me to hang on, to seek healing and hope.
Like this man says to Jesus in Mark’s account,

“Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, ‘I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!’ (Mark 9:24)

Jesus’s gentle admonition does not defeat me but compels me.
‘Jesus, I know I don’t believe as I should, but I want to… please help me!’
If you struggle to believe, if you have given up on church, do not despair.
You are a part of a larger group of people who also struggle like this.
The church may accuse you of being immoral backsliders, but Jesus knows your heart.
Jesus sees you, and DOES bear with you, and WILL help you.
Jesus comes to us in our religious disillusionment and says,

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

PRAYER
Lord Jesus, I also belong to a generation that struggles to believe, and that has turned away from religion and churchianity. Yet You have not turned away from, or given up on me. You do bear with me in love, and you will help me.'I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!'